It is often difficult to change our habits, even when they aren’t working well for us at all. Somehow it seems easier if we are accountable to someone. Does that reach back to the place where we wanted to win a race to see the look on Mom or Dad’s face? Or to bring home a ribbon or a trophy? To have a visible measure of the worth of our effort?

Is the effort less worthy if nobody knows? Not at all, maybe even more worthy for not having to shout it out. But perhaps not as much fun if kept to ourselves. Joy shared feels like more joy than just recognition alone. Alone it feels similar to checking off an item on a long to do list, not an amazing turn around of a deep-seated habit!

For that, it is nice to have family, friends or community. They are our support people and our cheerleaders, there to help us up if we trip, so that we can stay on the path. Most of us hope to inspire others in some way, and in isolation, that is impossible….except for inspiring ourselves to beat our own record the next time, to reach for an even higher goal.  That counts,too, perhaps even more.

Anytime we start something new, we have the power to create a fresh version of ourselves. The sum total of what we have learned comes with us into any new situation or relationship. Just like moving into a new home, how often do we really examine the things we are bringing with us?

Do they hold good memories, or are we merely dragging them along because they have always been with us? Boxes of books and magazines we haven’t read. Clothes that fit a body that may never return. Grandmother’s dresser that your sister really wanted and you don’t even like, but coveted the prize she sought?

How much easier life would be if we let go of some of the things we lug around, to make room for the person we are choosing to grow into. There is little room for a plant to grow in a crowded pot.

A new job allows the same possibilities. Bringing what you know into a fresh light with new sources of knowledge and awareness. The opportunity to find challenges to expand your mind and your horizon. To see yourself anew in a different place.

That is one of the hopes of a move, many times. To give ourselves a place to bloom and grow toward a light that may have become hidden. Light is such an important factor in the choosing of most homes. I have noticed that dark homes seem to attract secretive souls, while most people look for an abundance of natural light. Certainly there are times in our lives when we may cling to darkness, but we can always choose to turn on the light.

….comes around, or so they say. How often do we notice how true that is? That we are often rewarded for something we have done, though perhaps not by the one who may have been on the receiving end?

It is obvious to me (because I notice and remark about these things) that often when we experience a loss, there is a similar gain somewhere in our personal world, be it to a child, a parent, or a friend. Often we don’t count those as our gains. However, if that same person had experienced the opposite, we would certainly have felt their pain.

We pray for things but often don’t  realize that they have been granted, and that those answers are as much gifts to us as they are to the person in our prayers.

We are all part of the people around us, the ‘family’ in our daily lives. Notice how much the good that comes into their lives benefits your peace of mind, freeing you to keep doing what you need to do, as another problem has been solved. They are all our gifts, no matter who opens them!

The front door is the business card of your residence. It says whether you draw people in by your welcome, or perhaps like to stay hidden behind a front entrance that really says “I don’t care if you come in or not.”

There are doors with so much stuff at the entrance that we aren’t sure if there is room for us to get in, or if we are just supposed to admire their arrangement, as in a museum. Some people go in through their garage and never even notice whether their entrance is inviting or not.

Whenever possible, my choice is a red door. Is has an energy to it, in any shade from burgundy to rust. It glistens like the lipstick on a woman’s mouth and gives your home a smile. It keeps you focused as you approach the driveway, and lingers in your mind as you back out. There is no way you could miss the message “We’re excited to see you….come on in!”

My posts sometimes appear to be a little about real estate and a lot about life. That is because I find buying a new home often represents all the unfinished business we hope a different house will miraculously take care of. “If I had more cabinets, I would put more stuff away. If I had a sidewalk I would walk every day and lose wieght.” It really isn’t true, from my observations.

We will take our same habits and intentions to the new place, and there is no guarantee that anything will be different because we have moved. Tenants who care for a tiny house are apt to take equal care of a larger one. If your relationship is stressed, buying a new home will probably just magnify the problems.

Take a serious look at the reasons you want to move, then see if any of them can be applied right where you are. It might save you a lot of time and money!

I think they are the same. After a week spent re-organizing emails, creating files and folders, it occurred to me that my kitchen counters were a reminder of why this was so difficult for me to get.

I keep a Crockpot, a blender, and a Cuisinart on my kitchen counter, though I rarely cook and never chop or blend. My reasoning was that if I put them out of sight I would forget to use them. I see them every day and I never use them.

I had the same difficulty moving a mass of computer files out of immediate view, though infinitely findable should I need them. I had this enormous fear that I would forget where they were if I couldn’t see them. Every day I visually had to scan hundreds of files I might never need, just to find the one that I wanted.

It is the same fear; but I have put the Crockpot, blender and Cuisinart in a cabinet, and the files are moving to folders just as quickly.

I was musing to my 30-yr old son yesterday how life’s journey reminded me of a navigational system, except we are not privy to a map of the course we are taking. It is comforting, when going toward a destination, to see only a road or two ahead, knowing the big arrow will give us enough time to make the turn up ahead and keep on course. Read the rest of this entry »

On Monday I wrote about the power of photographing your mess. I just wanted you to know 20 minutes is all the time it actually took. I only got one space done, and yes, there are some phone notes and folders I haven’t found a better home for, but I resisted the temptation to start painting the other stool black! Staying focused is always a problem in the home clean-up area, but all the items found a real home(or the trash basket) and are not just out of sight, but put where I would be most likely to use or find them. Hooray! The clean picture will serve as a reminder, posted in a drawer nearby. Next?

One of the best ways I can help people get ready to put their house on the market is to take digital pictures. In fact, most times I ask them to take their own the week before we take the official ones to market it. By shooting different places, like the refrigerator (full of magnets) and the counter tops, they often notice how things they have become accustomed to seeing (and tend to look right past) will show up in a picture.

This is enough incentive to clean up, and eliminates the need for me to mention it. I often go home and shoot a few of my own home, alarming myself sufficiently to get cracking on the obvious! It is amazing how bad things look in a picture that don’t seem to bother me at all in person. Imagine putting your home on the market next week and take some pictures to see how it will look online. I think I will find twenty minutes to tackle these two spaces this week!